Stories Contributed by Our Visitors:
January 2005 to June 2005
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- Kim, Chandler, AZ
- My youngest brother Josh died on March 8th 2005 of a sudden heart attack at the age of 33.
This was a shock to my entire family. I went home to California to grieve with my family.
The day I left to go home to Arizona, we went to the cemetary so I could say good bye to Josh.
I asked my parents for a few monents alone with Josh. As I was standing there, talking to
him - I asked him if he knew how much I loved him - just at that moment a BEAUTIFUL Monarch
Butterfly fluttered down to the flowers right before me - I started to laugh and cry at the
same time, I asked "Josh, is that you?" I knew it was. Then he just flew off. He wanted me
to know that he was happy being home with GOD and that my parents, brother and I were all
going to be just fine.
- Joanne, Hammond, IN
- My best friend's little brother Chris died when he was only 13. He was like a little brother
to me too, he even called my mom his grandma. When my mom and I went to the hospital to see
him hours before his passing I noticed a picture on the wall in his room, it was of dolphins
breaching and I thought for sure that it was a sign as I am a dolphin fanatic. Previously
I had lived in Florida and in one of our conversations I had told Chris about seeing
dolphins breaching in the water, I also told him about the St. Petersburg bridge that I
had driven over and how pretty it was. Chris told me that when he was old enough to drive
that he was going to drive me over that bridge again.
After he died, his family (all of which reside in Indiana) had donated his organs-a little boy
from St. Petersburg Florida got his kidneys, now Chris can drive over that bridge.
A few months after his death me and my mother were camping and we had just finished swimming
and were talking about Chris and about how much we missed him when a beautiful butterfly
landed on my shoulder and just sat there for at least 5 minutes. We were sure that it was
Chris coming to tell us hi. Then, about a year and a half ago, my father passed away.
I was really sad and was sitting on the couch on the verge of tears over his death when a
little moth came and landed on my leg. At that moment I knew it was my dad coming to tell me
that he was O.K. I wanted to get my mom so that she could see it but I didn't want it to fly away.
It sat on my leg for several minutes and then I told it that I was going to be fine, that I just
really loved and missed my dad. It flew off in the direction of the kitchen but when I went to
find it, I could not.
Four days ago, my mother-in-law pawsed away. She and my husband were very very close and
he took it really hard. He kept telling me that God had taken away his mother and how could
He do that to him. I kept trying to explain to him that God did not take her away, he took
her home. He absolutely lost all faith in God at that point.
Two days after she passed away, we drove to pick up his sister in Southern Illinois. Just before we were getting ready to leave I told my husband that I was waiting for a sign for his mom. I refreshed his memory about my experiences with butterflies and moths when Chris and my dad died and told him that I did not know when or what the sign would be but I was sure that we would get one. He really just thought it was a bunch of nonsense but was too kind to say so. We then left to go and pick up his sister and on the drive back he asked me several times to stop at a gas station so he could use the bathroom. I passed up several exits but did not stop until I got to a rest area off of the highway. We got out of the car and his two sisters and his nephew got out of the car and walked in to the rest area. Me and my husband got out and started walking up to the building after them when I spotted what looked like a dead leaf laying on the ground which was odd for it being summer. I looked down and said is that a moth or a leaf? We both looked and assumed it was a leaf and walked away. A few minutes later my husband said he would be right back. I thought he was going to the car but when he came back he had in his hand the biggest moth I have ever seen in my life. It was perfectly still in his hand and I had assumed it was dead. Still thinking it was dead I told him to put in in a box and let his nephew have it- he is into these kind of things. He handed it to his nephew and went to get a small box from the car. The moth then walked from his nephews hand and sat on his finger. We were all actually shocked to realise that the moth was alive. It sat on his finger for a few minutes and again I assumed that since the moth didn't fly away that it was injured and couldn't fly. I told his nephew that since it was still alive he could not keep it, that it deserved to be free. I was just about to tell him to lay it down in the grass and let it be when he raised his finger and that moth flew away. I was not injured like I had thought but yet had let both my husband and our nephew hold it for at the very least 10 minutes. I never thought about it being a sign at all from his mother, I really just didn't think about it. We got back in the car and started driving again when my husband blurted out "THE MOTH! THAT WAS MY MOM!" When I realised what he was saying it all made sense. After all of these years I happened to tell him on that very day about the two other experiences I had, stopping at the rest area instead of the 10 gas stations we could have stopped at, everying else walking directly past the moth on the ground without seeing it, and the the moth actually allowing them to hold it for so long. Now he truly believes. It seems like the first time was weird, the second coincidence, the third a miracle. I truly believe that God sends us a little sign just to let us know that He and our loved ones are always watching over us.
- Jenn, Gibsonia, PA
- My 22 year old brother-in-law passed away this past Saturday, June 18th. While walking
through my inlaws yard with my husband, we both saw a butterfly. I just lost it, remembering
the poem someone shared with me just months before:
A Butterfly lights beside us like a sunbeam, and for a brief moment his beauty and glory belong to our world.......
but then he flies on. And although we wished he could have stayed, we feel so blest to have seen him........
The next day I found a perfect picture of Matt and framed it with that poem. Soon
after Dad came from sitting on the swing with Mom and read it. He said that a butterfly
was far away and they saw it. It flew all the way up to them and landed on the swing for
a second, then flew in between them, up into the sky. The next day (Monday), my sister in
law went out on to her deck and there was a butterfly there, too. Amazing, I think we know
Matt is okay. We sure will miss him.
- Michelle Beaver, Hatboro, PA
- After my grandfather had passed away, my grandmother had taken me to the neighborhood
where he grew up to see his old house. We went for a walk in the park across the street
and spent hours talking about him. While we were walking, a monarch butterfly came from
behind me and flew in front of my face. It fluttered in front of me as I took what seemed like
several steps. It was very unusual. Then my grandmother said, "that was Poppop." I asked
her what she meant and she told me of her beleif that monarch butterflies are the spirits
of our loved ones coming back to say hi. I loved the thought of that and ever since I have
had several 'encounters'.
My boyfriend's father, who was also a dear friend of mine, passed away a couple of years ago. I
told my boyfriend, when he was ready to hear it, my feelings about the monarch butterfly.
Together we have seen one every time we visit his resting place and other times when we
hope that he is around. I think it is his way of letting us know he approves, cares and
loves us. And it just makes me feel good to know he is around.
- Daniel, New York, NY
- My father had been in and out of hospitals for the past few years. I was so used to him
coming back home and going about his daily life as before that I was very shocked and surprised
that he was not able to do that this time around. I had come home after the hospital and
had decided to go out onto the balcony to say a short prayer to him. Just as I had set foot
onto the balcony this large beautiful yellow with black stripped butterfly appeared before me.
It started to fly around, sitting here and there for a good portion of my preyer. I had felt
a very warm and happy feeling afterwards and decided to call my mother and tell me of this
beautiful butterfly that I saw.
A few hours later I got a call from my mother in tears and very emotional calling me from
outside of the funeral home. She finally calmed down just enough for her to tell me that
just now she had saw this large beautiful yellow with black stripped butterfly flying about her.
Such a coincidence has given me a great deal of strengh and hope in helping me in dealing with
- Jamie, Thornhill, ON CANADA
- One day I went to a favourite gardening place of mine. It has a butterfly conservatory. I
asked a staff if you could get any stage of a butterfly. They said yes you can get a
chrysallis for $7.00. So I bought it (well my Dad did.) Then I took it home with me and put
it in a cage. Soon it hatched! I was going to let it go when I noticed it had a bent wing and
antennae. So I made it a home in my room. It is now known as a pet in my house. It had trouble
figuring out how to eat flowers. It finally learnt how to eat flower nectar. I named her
Miraclefly the Painted Lady butterfly. I have a butterfly garden which she likes to sit in.
She's the star of both my 'Raise a butterfly' club and my nature club. I made her a natural
habitat in my house behind my closet door. I'm happy that I have her as a pet.
Jamie, 7 years old.
- Hannah, North Hollywood, CA
- We have a butterfly that broke it's wings and we're surprised that it lived for 14 days so far.
We gave it oranges and flowers and sugar water tissue balls. It looks old but it's really happy.
We had 5 butterflies but we set the other four free. We let the one with the broken wing out
if it's habitat and let it discover the grass but we watched it and then we put it back in its
habitat which we had bought with the original caterpillars. I am almost 7 years old.
- Charlotte, Iota, LA
- I fell in love with my Joey in 1998. He was doing some jail time for alcohol related
offenses and had changed his ways, but he still had to pay for what he had done.
I saw Joey's wonderful qualities and when we realized we were in love, I told him I'd wait
for him. I waited 5 years. When he was released on March 23, 2003, I was there to get him.
Whenever I'd see him walk through the door, or drive up in the driveway, I'd get "butterflies".
I told him about the butterflies. He said when he would get a call from me, or see me it was
the same for him. We were so silly and in love. I thanked God everyday for sending
Joey into my life.
We were married October 3, 2003. We agreed to always keep the butterflies. January 15, 2005,
Joey said "Baby...I don't give you butterflies anymore do I?" I hugged him and assured him he
would always give me butterflies. I went to the store and bought artificial butterflies and
hung them everywhere. I bought air freshners for the vehicles and put them in his truck.
I bought a card with butterflies on it and in it I told him how much I loved him.
He was so happy when he saw all of this and knew I loved him very much.
On January 21st, 2005, State Police arrived at my place of employment and advised me
My Joey had been killed in a motorcycle accident. My world crashed down around me. I lost
my soul mate. God gave me strength but I was so lonely. That is when butterflies began
appearing everywhere. I'd see a butterfly outside and smile, because I felt it was God's
way of comforting me. My children and I took a trip to Walt-Disney world and they had
planted flowers in the shape of butterflies. People were wearing clothes with butterflies
on it. I see jewlery with butterflies, planters, wind chimes and flags. When I see
these butterflies, I just smile and say "thank you God for giving me my Joey for the
short time you did and thank you for the butterflies". Everytime I see a butterfly,
I am reminded of the wonderful man that touched my life like no other man ever has. He will always give me butterflies.
- Peter, New Haven, CT
This isn't so much of a story as it is a... coincidence.
I went online to find out some more information on a song called ""Yellow Butterfly"", recorded by a band called The Party (on their album ""The Party's Over... Thanks For Coming"", released in 1994 I think), and stumbled upon your website. After reading the touching stories posted here, I thought, how appropriate and inspirational this song would be to some of your readers. It truly is a beautiful song, sung by an extremely talented young woman by the name of Deedee Magno. (Who later starred in ""Miss Saigon"" on Broadway.) The words go something like this;
I saw a yellow butterfly
This pretty butterfly just passed me by
She flew above me to say hello
Waved a wing at me to let me know
I'll stay away
From all my worries
And my tears and fears will dry from the sun
I can't be afraid to face tomorrow
'Cuz I'll finally be free
Free to be with me...
I think about that butterfly
When times are down
I need hope to take me high
I wanna run away
I want to fly
Why can't I
Fly like butterflies before I die
I'll stay away
From all my worries
And if so I know I'll fly to the sun
I can't be afraid to face tomorrow
'Cuz I'll finally be free
Free to be with me...
I don't know where you can buy a copy of this song- I would say that I'm happy to share my copies of it, but that would be illegal now, wouldn't it?
Hope this sparks some interested in this beautiful song!
- Margaret-An Boyd, Markham, ON, CANADA
- We have been raising Painted Ladies in my classroom. While trying to feed the ones that
have hatched, the last Chrysalis fell from the lid of the butterfly box. I quickly picked it
up and was all ready to glue it up when it started to hatch in my hand. I quickly got all of
the Kindergarten children around me and we watched it split open and become a butterfly. What
an amazing sight and what a memorable moment for the me and the children.
I can't say how excited I was and the children. It came out healthy and started walking all over
my arm. It opened its wings up about ten minutes later. It is doing well and we will be
watching it and the others play with each other in the box until Friday when
we will let them go.
- Megan, Tustin, CA
- Butterflies were in my Mom's preschool classroom so that the children could observe them.
Most of the butterflies had already emerged from their chrysalids, but one seemed to be taking
a little bit longer. One boy got very frustrated with that butterfly and began shaking it so
the butterfly would come out. The chrysalid fell to the ground and began shaking uncontrollably.
That butterfly came out a day or so later but its wings were crumbled up and never opened right.
"What's wrong with him?" one girl asked. My mom explained how the butterfly was forced out
and everyone has to do things at their own pace.
I gave the butterfly extra care and remembered
my mother's words. Soon the day came to let them go. The other butterflies flew away. I carefully
set the hurt one on a flower. As I pulled my hand away, he walked back on my hand. I put him on
the flower again but he walked on my hand again. I tried this several times but the butterfly
wouldn't leave. We decided that the butterfly wanted to stay and we kept him at our house for
a few days until he died. I learned an important lesson from that one small butterfly.
- Alyssa, AUSTRALIA
- My daughter, Penny-Lane, was stillborn last year at full term. Oon the day I was delivering
her body in hospital there was a huge swarm of butterflies gathered outside the window. They
stayed there until I left the hospital. The next week I had a Reiki healing and during it I
had a visualisation that I was in a garden. the healer said my baby was there. I looked for her
all through the garden but couldn't find her. Then a huge group of butterflies of all sizes
and colours flew down from the sky and spiralled around me. It was clear - my baby is now a
Butterflies often swoop right in front of my eyes and they seem to be everywhere I go now.
- Rachael, Mansfield, MA
- When I was a little girl, about eleven, I developed an eating disorder called anorexia.
As I got older it only got worse and about two years ago it almost killed me and took me out of
dance which was my life. I almost didn't graduate either. Luckily my mother had the smarts to get
legal gaurdianship of my medical and put me in the hospital. It's a good thing she did too
because I wouldnt have made it otherwise.
I spent about 6 months in a medical hospital on bed rest and feeding tubes, but when it came
time for me to go to a residential treatment, I was scared, very scared. I honestly didn't believe
that I would do well there and didn't believe that this would ever go away. Throughout my
treatment my boyfriend at the time bought me a journal and stickers with butterflys on them,
and that sparked a memory of me and my grandmother and how she use to tell me about how they
changed into beautiful butterflies and how as I grew and she watched me dance she thought of
me as a beautiful changing butterfly, and that inspired me and made me realize everyone has the
chance to change.
Well ever since that day when I remembered her words butterflies have
been a big part of my treatment and my life, they remind me that there is hope and that
things can change. I actually got one tattooed on my wrist to always remind me of how inspiring
they are to me :).
I am still in treatment but I live on my own and I'm in school and dancing again! And butterflies
still make me feel strong.
- Michelle Casey, Hervey Bay, Queensland, AUSTRALIA
- My sister was killed in a car accident 15 years ago. Cathy asked for her ashes to be placed
at her favourite beach. We were walking up the beach which took about 2 hours
because we did not want her ashes moved again. A big green butterfly followed us all
the way up the beach. Patricia my other sister was hurt in the accident, as well,
so she was walking really slowly. We took quitars to the beach as she loved sitting around
with the quitars singing. We all stayed at the beach for the day and sang imagine by John Lennon
which was her favourite song. The same big green butterfly stayed with us all day and
landed on different people at different times of the day.
- Samantha Ryan, Townsville, Queensland, AUSTRALIA
- I want to tell you my story of how I felt when I lost my sweet grandmother Janet Curnow.
My grandmother would give me candy.
Be by my side when I needed someone most.
When I was lonely she welcomed me with open arms.
She didn't judge me about the things I said and did.
When we were with her in hospital she always said to me "you're my girl and I love you
and I'll always be there for you and I'll never leave your side" and guess what she did
and it broke my heart when she left me because she says that she'll always be there and she isn't.
But I'll never forget what we had, it was something special. And I'll always remember her
sweet voice. It's like an angel sighing. I know this isn't a very long story but words can't
describe how I feel inside.
- Alameda, CA
- Today I saved a butterfly. Today, maybe a butterfly saved me too. I am caught up in my busy life, I'm a mom, a wife, an employee. I was preoccupied (amongst many other things) with the fact that I'm coming home to a sick child with whom my husband stayed home today.
When I stepped off the train after my day at work, a butterfly lay on the cement just out of footstep's range. I stopped short when I saw it laying there. A very strange, instinctual feeling swept over me. I have to get this creature to a safe place. I cannot let it lie here. Get it somewhere it can live its last day or two in comfort, away from the passing feet of commuters. Get it somewhere that it can have the memory of its last living moments in nature. I bent down to pick it up and then carried it through the station, through the ticket gate, past the parking lot, past more cars, past the cheap parking lots, to my parking lot, the cheapest parking lot, far away. This butterfly had been injured, likely by the passing train on which I was so comfortably riding home in.
My car was warm and quiet. I started the car and drove home. The whole way I felt as though I was transporting precious cargo. I was responsible for seeing this creature to its resting place.
My daughter was in the house watching Clifford's Big Movie. My husband was on the excersize machine. He looked at me and saw the butterfly, still clinging onto the sleeve of my coat. "What is that?", he said, huffing and puffing. I told him the story as he churned around and around, sweating. My daughter, Olivia came to see. We went to sit down on the couch and she asked if she could hold it. I let her, instructing her on its fragile state. This 3 year old child was more gentle than I have ever seen her.
After telling her that the butterfly was injured, probably by the passing train, I suggested that we needed to take the butterfly to our back yard, and that it would be happy in the trees that had blossoms that were yellow and purple. She agreed that this was a good idea. So she went to her room, put sandals on the wrong feet, came outside in her "I stayed home sick today" jammies and backward sandals, and we placed the injured butterfly on a low branch of a beautiful, delicate tree in our back yard. She and I looked on in happiness and sadness. Maybe it would live. Maybe it would not.
I hope it was able to heal its wing and injured leg. At least it was able to heal in peace.
I love my child. And I loved that she and I shared that moment. When I was just a bit older than she is now, I found an injured butterfly and I learned about dying and the cycle of life. I remember that butterfly I found in the woods surrounding our house, holding it in my hand, in Astoria, Oregon. I will never forget it. Today I relived that day as an adult, so similar to the day I found an injured butterfly back in 1976. I have never forgotten it, and still think of it every time I see butterflies. Today is a day that will never be forgotten either.
Today has a lot of meaning. Today I saved a butterfly. And today, maybe a butterfly saved me.
- Janice, PHILIPPINES
- While watching the funeral of Pope John Paul II, I lit a candle for him on my bedroom
balcony and prayed. I knew it wasn't much, I just wanted to say goodbye. I closed my eyes
and pictured his face smiling, with God smiling as well, right beside him. I cried and wished
him well, and to bless me and my loved ones. When I opened my eyes, a butterfly fluttered
right in, hovered right in front of me for a few seconds, and flew down beside me. Knowing
I live in a condominium in the middle of the city, I was silent for a moment. Then, I whispered
goodbye, and the butterfly flew out again, up up up to the sky.
- Juanita Deptowicz, Cuyahoga Falls, OH
- Time and again I found my self questioning God. After my friend died I had questions on
if he would be going to heaven? I was very concerned and very confused. I kept telling
myself ...Juanita you won't know until you get there. Lately I was thinking about it more and
more, for whatever reason I couldn't let it go. I asked God to help me and for a sign. A week
went by without a sign, and I carried about my usual business. I came home late Friday night
and went to take a shower. I opened up my curtain and there was the most beautiful butterfly!
We had a huge snow storm that night , almost 19 inches. I didn't understand how a butterfly
could get in the house, or how one would even able to be alive this time of year. After
researching online I found your site to be the biggest inspiration. Now I know my Dave IS
in heaven, and that he is alright. I know because God sent me that sign, and let me find your site.
- Allecia Imboden, Lebanon, PA email@example.com
- On Friday February 25, 2005 I stopped in to visit with my mom after work. We sat there and had
coffee and small talk. As expected our conversation eventually turned to my dad.
Dad passed away October 20, 2004. It was also my mom's 74th birthday.
I was having one of those "days" when thinking about dad being gone really bothered me.
I remember saying "Why does God allow suffering .. and sadness and loss?
Why does he even give us people and families to love .. only to have them taken away from us?
Why are we even born? Is there a greater purpose? A bigger plan? .. (Sigh*)
Mom was quiet for a moment...and finally she looked at me and said,
"Leasie, look at the butterfly. God takes a tiny caterpillar, turns it into a chrysalis
and just when you think it's dead he turns it into a beautiful butterfly. If he can give a
caterpillar new life don't you think he can do that for us too?"
Now normally I would have been comforted by her comments, but that day I was so down,
I just wasn't comforted. You see since dad passed away I had been asking God to please give me a
sign that dad was alive in Heaven.
On Sunday morning February 27th I was in bed when I heard my son Josh talking.
He excitedly yelled for me to hurry .. come in to the living room. As I got up I heard him say
"Mom, quick .. come in here, there's a butterfly in the house!" I came in to the living room
and sure enough, on a lovely cold day in February, there he was, the most beautiful,
just born, butterfly. He was sitting on the leaf of a plant, slowly moving his wings.
I was in awe. My first thought was this was a miracle from God, Dad is alive, heaven is real,
and eternity is a promise kept! My second thought was I have to call my mom.
A few minutes later I called my mother. I said "Mom, you're not gonna believe this,
but there is a butterfly in my house. Mom was quiet for a moment. I could tell she was crying,
I knew this was an affirmation for her as well. Finally she said "Just 2-3 minutes ago I was
thinking of you, about dad, and our conversation about butterflies, and then you called me."
Now you may wonder where "Monty"came from. Last September
of 2004 we found the most awesome caterpillar I had ever seen.
He was a neat greenish yellow with what looked like two big black eyes.
I even took a few pictures of it.
He was on an outside plant I had. My son was playing around with it because he thought
it was so cool. The next day I noticed he was looking kind of shrivelled. Josh told me he was
going to turn into a chrysalis. Well in late October I took my plants into the house.
I never gave this caterpillar another thought. That is until February 27th.
For those of you who think this was simply a coincidence that's your choice.
I believe God's timing was perfect. Monty was an answer to prayer, and a gift of hope.
I named my butterfly "Monty". Initially I thought he was a monarch butterfly but have
since learned through your website he was a black swallowtail.
Monty as a caterpillar Sept04
Just born February 27, 05
My son Josh with Monty
- Leigh, Portland, OR
- At my sister's wedding we released several butterflies during the ceremony. My brother
shared a poem about the the soul being a part of a butterfly after you die. It was a beautiful
moment and my mother was pleased because she had been the one who promoted the signifigance of
A year later, my mother died. My family decided to go to her favorite place, our family cabin
and relax after the funeral. After the weekend was over we were all packing the car, getting
ready to leave and out of nowhere this monarch butterfly began to fly around each one of our heads.
We all froze and began smiling at each other. The funny thing was, it was too early in the
season for a monarch to be living there.
- Sarah Ahmad, Jodhpur, Rajasthan, INDIA
- While I was in my garden one day, feeling upset because I wanted to get down a book to
read and it was really high up in a shelf. There was no adult in the house to get out the Book
for me and even standing on a chair could not make me reach it.
At that moment, I saw a monarch butterfly. It was a small one, but very pretty. I noticed
it wanted to reach a particularly high up hollyhock flower but could not reach it. As this
in fACT was my problem, I watched with mounting interest. Unlike me, the butterfly kept
trying anD slowly managed to reach the flower where it sat contentedly. Then to my surprise,
it bounded up to me and fluttered around my head and went back to the flower.
I learnt my lesson and tried to fetch the book again and again. I managed to. That little
monarch helped me learn an important lesson that day and you know the strangest thing?
The book I wanted to read was how a butterfly had helped a king win wars...
- Sandy, Waxhaw, NC
- My mom passed away Jan 4th 2003. She loved the yellow and black butterflies. She said
they were a sign of peace and hope. Well, my sister her husband and kids, me and my cousin
drove up to Tennesse to spread my mom's remains on her family's land on May 11th 2003, Mothers Day.
We have been having a real hard time accepting the death of our mother.
On the way back
from the trip we stopped a rest stop. Me, my daughter and my niece were riding in a pickup
truck with my cousin driving. It had an ext cap which my niece and daughter were riding in.
We were all getting out of the truck and Kristina (my niece) whispered to me to come here.
Well she moved slightly and there was a huge black and yellow butterfly sitting in between
her and her pocketbook almost under her. It was sitting there flapping its wings really slow.
She picked it up and and it sat on her hand. Then my sister and her husband drove up and
we called her over, we showed her the butterfly and she about fainted, and started crying
saying that after we left mama on the mountain she prayed she would send us a butterfly to
let us know she is at peace and ok. Well she did, that butterfly let my 9 year old daughter
and my 6 year old niece hold it. It went to each person still flapping its wings slowly,
we all could not stop crying. We finally put the butterfly on a limb on a little tree at
the rest stop, it sat there until we all drove off then it flew away. I believe that
butterfly was my mom - she was letting us know everything is ok.
Now we see them all the time. There is one that comes to the porch and I see them when I
am having a bad day or just thinking about mama.
- Kazan K. Dela Cruz, Kaunakakai, Hawaii
- Well my story begins when I lost my Mother Moana M. Kaulia. She was well loved by many and
especially my children. About a week and a half after my mom passed my three sons were outside
playing. There is this contaminated river near our house and my sons were told
never to go in it. Well that day I went looking for them and I found them in that same river.
I pulled them out and started scolding them and sent them in their room for the rest of the day.
As I passed their room that evening they were discussing what happened. I heard my youngest boy
say "Did you get her" and my other son said "Yes she is in the bottle". They were silent for a
little bit as I listened wondering what they were talking about and my son says "Let her free.
I want to play with Gramma." I heard them laughing. One of my sons said that the butterfly
was beautiful and they all said "just like gramma, yeah she was beautiful." They went into a
contaminated river to catch a butterfly that they thought was their gramma and I punished them.
I went into the room and just gave them all a big hug and kiss and we talked. That day I shared a
new way of looking at butterflies and my sons always when they see a butterfly they would say
"hi gramma we are fine."
Many times after that butterflies were everywhere. At Christmas we decorated our tree with
butterflies at the request of my children. On the day they opened their presents a
butterfly flew into the house and just sat on the table, and they have landed on my
children while outside and my children would just sit there and talk to the
butterflies like it was their gramma. I believe that too.
- Roger Dean Kiser, Brunswick, GA
There was a time in my life when beauty meant something special to me. I guess that would have been when I was about six or seven years old, just several weeks or maybe a month before the orphanage turned me into an old man.
I would get up every morning at the orphanage, make my bed just like the little soldier that I had become and then I would get into one of the two straight lines and march to breakfast with the other twenty or thirty boys who also lived in my dormitory.
After breakfast one Saturday morning I returned to the dormitory and saw the house parent chasing the beautiful monarch butterflies who lived by the hundreds in the azalea bushes strewn around the orphanage. I carefully watched as he would catch these beautiful creatures, one after the other, and then took them from the net and then stuck straight pins through their head and wings, pinning them onto a heavy cardboard sheet. How cruel it was to kill something of such beauty.
I had walked many times out into the bushes, all by myself, just so the butterflies could land on my head, face and hands so I could look at them up close. When the telephone rang the house parent laid the large cardboard paper down on the back cement step and went inside to answer the phone. I walked up to the cardboard and looked at the one butterfly who he had just pinned to the large paper. It was still moving about so I reached down and touched it on the wing causing one of the pins to fall out. It started flying around and around trying to get away but it was still pinned by the one wing with the other straight pin.
Finally it's little wing broke off and the butterfly fell to the ground and just quivered. I picked up the torn wing and the butterfly and I spat on it's wing and tried to get it to stick back on so it could fly away and be free before the house parent came back. But it would not stay on him.
The next thing I knew the house parent came walking back out of the back door by the garbage room and started yelling at me. I told him that I did not do anything but he did not believe me. He picked up the cardboard paper and started beating me on the top of the head. There were all kinds of butterfly pieces going everywhere. He threw the cardboard down on the ground and told me to pick it up and put it in the garbage can inside the back room of the dormitory and then he left.
I sat there in the dirt, by that big old tree, for the longest time trying to fit all the butterfly pieces back together so I could bury them whole, but it was too hard to do. So I prayed for them and then I put them in an old torn up shoe box and I buried them in the bottom of the fort that I had built in the ground, out by the large bamboos, near the blackberry bushes.
Every year when the butterflies would return to the orphanage and try to land on me I would always try and shoo them away, because they did not know that the orphanage was a bad place to live and a very bad place to die.
Stories from The Life and Times of Orphan, Roger Dean Kiser
- Heather, Mansfield, PA
- I guess my story goes back 7 years. I was happy and in love. For the first time in my entire
life, I felt totally content. Then my world came crashing down. I learned my boyfriend was
going to propose to me on our anniversary. I was so happy and excited. Two weeks after I learned
this, he was killed in a car accident. It was the most devastating event in my life,
and I have had many. I did not know how I could survive. 7 years later, and I am still struggling.
Still unable to move on, still crippled by the grief. I have always been afraid to open my heart
to someone else again. I have always missed him and wondered if he was okay. Since I lost him,
I have found myself in a pit of self doubt and grief. I stumbled on your website last night
and read some of the stories. I have an absolute love for butterflies because of their beauty,
grace, and ability to change. As I read the stories, I asked that I could too see a butterfly
miracle so I know that he is okay and that it is okay for me to move on and not be afraid.
I received my miracle in the form of 3 different emails from loved ones that were covered
in thousands of butterflies. I have been emailed by all them before and never sent a single
butterfly. Imagine my surprise when I received all the butterflies tonight. I think it was
my boyfriend whispering to them to send me the butterflies. I think it was his way of saying
he is okay and that I will be too. I am sure that I will always miss and love him, but
I believe that he is okay and that he is watching over me. I think that everytime I see
a butterfly, I will smile because I had the chance to know him, and that was a wonderful gift.
- Debbie Steffens, Plains, TX
- On January 26, 2004, I lost my best friend. She was more like a sister that just a friend.
She had been diagnosed the previous May with a fast growing cancer in her brain. Needless to say,
it was such a hard year, trying to be upbeat and supportive, while inside your heart was breaking.
Butterflies had always been Vickie's special thing. In fact, she told her daughter that
anytime she saw a butterfly, it was her watching over her child. On many occasions, when
talking about her, or perhaps a close call while driving, etc., a butterfly would suddenly appear.
Last summer, I was at my parents' house, riding 4-wheelers out in the pasture near some old
China Berry trees. It had been a real bad day and I was really down and depressed as I thought
about my friend. Just then it felt like she had her arms wrapped around me giving me a hug,
as hundreds of little pale yellow butterflies swarmed up and around me. I have never seen them
in this great numbers before or since. It was like a message from heaven. A little glimpse
to let me know that she was happy and wanted me to be happy for her. Needless to say, butterflies
are even more important to me and her daughter.
- KT, Pismo Beach, CA
I live on an expanse of five acres of lovely oak trees and hills, with two creeks and a pond.
I was walking through a grove of trees at the foot of my hill where the creek runs through,
looking at the small flies lit up from the setting sun.
Earlier that day I had accidentally killed a small red salamander while turning over rocks. I
felt very, very guilty and was a little broken about it. Out of nowhere I see a butterfly among
the tiny insects, flying around. Seeing as I had taken interest in them after writing a
fantasy story about them, I stood still and watched it flit about the grove, sometimes coming
so close I could hear the wingbeat. It was a marvelous sight, and when it landed on an oak,
I decided to investigate. I noted that its wings were a dark brownish color with a biege
outlining the tips. It was remarkable, really.
Later that day, I went to my internet, and decided to look at some buttefly websites for
further ideas for my fantasy story. I found the butterfly I saw earlier. Guess what it was called?
I was shocked.
- Dianne Gooch, Kernersville, NC
- I was overwhelmed when I found this website, with these inspirational stories.......the fact
I was not the only one that had butterflies enter my life after my nephew, Shawn died 12/12/03,
in a tragic car accident. It was the hardest thing I have ever gone through, the first loved one
I had lost, and he was only 29 yrs old, and left behind a 5 yr old son, Adam.
Shawn was like a brother to me, we were 10 years apart in age. Although unlike many of these
stories, I had several butterflies enter my life, before I realized what was happening.
It all started about July 2004, when we had a family get together at my sister's house, Shawn's
mom. Shawn's son Adam found a butterfly that had a injured wing, and he carried around all day
long. A couple of months later I had a dream about Shawn, he was flying done from heaven as spider
man with butterfly wings (when Shawn was 8 yrs old, I dressed him up as spider man for halloween
that year), so I knew this was him in my dream, but could not figure out why he had butterfly wings.
After this I was in traffic at a light, and flying in and out of cars was this beautiful butterfly,
a monarch, a couple of days later in my work parking lot another monarch flying around me......no
flowers or anything around, that would attract them....I was seeing them in the oddest places.
One Saturday night at my son's ball game, I was talking to my mom, about the dream, the butterfly
Adam had, and all of the ones that seem to come around me at odd times and places. I was asking
her do you think these are signs from Shawn, that he is okay. She really did think so........but
I was reassured that next Sunday morning at church. My husband and I sat down in our pew
(you also have to realize, my husband at this time thought I was crazy), and two pews in front
of us, the artist that draws all of our murals, sat down, and the back of the t-shirt she had on,
which she designed, I later found out, had a cross, with Jesus' hands going up at the top,
and butterfly wings on the sides of the cross. My husband and I both got cold chills.
Later that afternoon we were sitting out on our porch, and a monarch butterfly flew in between
my husband and I......to this day he truely believes as I do, that this was a sign from my nephew,
that he is in a heavenly place. The first week in December of 2004, my sister(Shawn's mom),
my mom(Shawn's Nana), and I were on our way to the mall to shop for Christmas, and we were
talking about Shawn and how we have found peace with his loss, because of butterflies, and
all of the signs........as we pulled in the parking lot of the mall, and went down the
first row of parking, at the end facing us as a target was the back of a car, and the whole
back windshield was a white butterfly outline, that took up the whole window, and we all
just sat there in tears. We actually purchased a disposable camera, and took a picture of it.
The very first butterfly I saw was two weeks after Shawn's wreck, and little did I know at
that time it would be the beginning of his sign to me....my 12 yr old daughter brought this
to my attention recently......she and I had went to the crash sight 2 wks after his wreck,
and some friends of his had put flowers at the sight, and a butterfly on a stick, that
when the wind blows, his wings flapped, I had forgotten all about this........he was
trying to send me the sign early on.
- Kimberlee A Bowker, Cambridge, MN
- As a young girl, I always felt that the Monarch Butterfly was special to me. It held a Natural Angelic Beauty, that I could not resist and adored to the core of my Spirit. Growing up it seemed they would find me, when I most needed Light in my heart.
When my son was born, I wanted to share this beautifull creature with him. So his first outting was to the Zoo, where they held a walk-thru Butterfly Exhibit. He lit up with Grace, and Smiles that touches my heart to this day.
They flew up to him, continuously, and landed on his face, hands everywhere... to me it was a sign of blessings. The Angels were all around him, and he loved it.
A number of years later...
I received a phone call telling us that my Aunt lay dying in the hospital. To get there asap, to say goodbye.
My mother (her sister) and I ran to the car, and began the trip to see her. As we began to leave town...
The Monarchs began to appear. One by One they began to gather in a group and fly alongside the car. I told my mom to look, and see this, for it was God sending his angels with us on our way. We should not worry.
Upon arriving and walking to the doorway of the Hospital,
We looked up and paused for a second. The Entrance of the Hospital, was Surrounded with Flittering Monarchs.
The tears began to well up in my eyes, and my heart was gently filled with peace, I told my mom, Everything is going to be alright, She is going to be fine. God is here, and he is showing us he is here, by sending them.
We went in and I asked to hang a crucifix above her bed.
It was allowed, with appreciation, and I told everyone, I believed she would be alright, Trying to ease them.
Two hours later, they took her off lifesupport, because she woke up and tried talking. She came back to us, and lived for a few more years. Thank God for Blessings, seen and Unseen!
- Cherie, Bargoed, WALES
- I fell pregnant last sept (2004) as I was 20 at the time and considering persuing my
future career it came as a bit of a shock to both my partner, myself and my family. When I
fell pregnant I had all four of my grand-parents alive. Although at first all were upset
and shocked as time went by and being in such a loving family everyone became overjoyed by
the idea of a great gand child coming into the world, especially my closest grandmother, Nana Moore.
I spent many of my days during maternity leave etc. leading up to the pregnancy with my nana
as she lived close to me. My nana fell ill about 2 weeks before my daughter Shayla was due to
be born, she was very ill and was taken to hospital, she was diagnosed with heart failure.
The prognosis was quite poor. She managed to fight back and was discharged a week before my
due date although became very ill as days went by. I was taken into hospital on the 26th of May,
Shayla was born 27th May after a long, exhausting labour. My Nana was told of Shayla's birth
that morning and was overjoyed, she telephoned everyone she knew to spread the good news.
Later that evening she was taken into hospital and on Friday 28th May died, the day I was
due to come out of hospital. She never got to see Shayla, although I knew in my heart she
would always be watching in some way. I moved house 2 weeks after Shayla was born and slowly
we sorted out the little box room into a nursery I had always longed for. I miss my Nana so
much and found coming to terms with her death very hard.
A few days after the nursery was finally finished I went upstairs to put some things away in
Shayla's nursery I was bewildered there in Shayla's cot where her head would lay was a
beautiful butterfly alive and moving its wings, I was breathtaken I called to my partner
and was very upset, he gently picked it up in his cusped hands and let it go out of the window.
It was as though she had come to have a look at Shayla's nursery and to let me know she is
watching through nature. It was my Nana's wish to be cremated and scattered in the wind,
she wanted to be free and her wishes were granted she was scattered into the air on a
mountain top we use to visit as children. I now feel wherever I turn I see butterflies
printed on things etc. on Shayla's blanket, her clothes, my christmas crakers on
Shayla's first Christmas when we opened them had butterfly clips in a few of them.
I know feel that the magnificent butterfly is a symbol I can relate to my Nana, to feel in
touch with her and is easing my grieving for her.
- Rita Castrignano, Berlin, MD
- My son Thomas Koval went to the lord on May 5th 1998. He was only 33 years old and left a
wife Deborah and two sons Thomas 7 and Tyler 2. I was so heart-broken not only for myself but
for his children and a month later I moved near Ocean City MD. My daughter-in-law Deborah
and my grandchildren came to visit and we went to the beach and as we were walking into the water
a cloud of Monarcht buterflies flew around us all the way into the water. To me it was my son
telling us everything would work out.
Two years my daughter-in-law Deborah married a wonderful man Frank who loves my grandchildren as
if they were his own and numerous times since then monarchs have flown by me in my back yard on
the boardwalk, just a little reassurance that my son is always watching over.
- Bonnie, Denver, CO
- Stumbled on this site, visiting our daughter. So happy to read these. We lost our youngest
son in 2002. We miss him so much. I was outside in Denver right after he passed and a
big yellow butterfly flew past me, turned around and came back. Found out it was a swallowtail.
I have never seen one before. I would go out side and ask Jesus if he would send it again, here
it would come. Have so many times had different things, always the same kind of butterfly.
It seems no matter where we travel, we have a butterfly come to us.
On our way to church in the summer of 203, my husband decided to walk in the street. It was
easier and called for me to come there, the same kind of butterfly was lying there, hurt,
amazing a car didn't run over it. I picked it up, took it to church and then home. I tried
to give it a flower and it finally fell over onto the floor and I layed his wings flat and it died.
I put it in a shadow box, to this day it is perfect in every way.
On our 50th Anniversary, we had a small yellow butterfly in church. I asked that he could
be with us. The next day for the first time a yellow butterfly at the cemetery. Thanks for
letting me share this